Mental Toughness with Brandon Farmer

Chapter Overview:

0:00 – Introduction
1:07 – Meeting and Initial Fitness
2:08 – Fitness Journey
2:43 – 75 Hard Impact
3:36 – Discipline and Challenges
4:23 – Fitness and Growth
5:21 – 75 Hard Program Details
6:15 – Hardest Part of 75 Hard
7:50 – Sleep Habits
8:57 – Importance of Sleep
9:50 – Overall Impact of 75 Hard
11:29 – Discipline in Life and Business
13:29 – Returning to LPS
14:22 – Impact on Relationships and Confidence
15:25 – Emotional Challenges and Routine
16:41 – Work Ethic and Business Success
17:29 – Being Present and Focused
19:15 – Full Circle
20:35 – Dominating by Control of Mind

Clance: Welcome to Dominate Discussions, where we discuss strength and conditioning and much more. Brandon Farmer, what’s happening? Monster in the business world. Entrepreneur, multiple restaurants and other things I don’t even know about. But I hear you. I know you for a long time because you were a client of mine, still are a client of mine, now you’re a friend, graduated to friend status.

Brandon: Consistent client of yours.

Clance: Yeah. I remember I met you how many years ago, man?

Brandon: I think it was…I’ll tell you, I remember how I got into LPS. I used to live at the Soho Hotel. And I remember our condo would look at, you’d have all the athletes, you were training PK before he went pro. My roommate and I would just see you doing the sled pulls. And he walked over, he’s like, I gotta check this place out. These guys look like beasts over there. And yeah, I think we just walked over one day. And I didn’t, I’ve never squatted in my life. I remember I couldn’t even do my own body weight in the beginning. Which actually in the long run worked out because I think that my form is phenomenal because I started from the base. But yeah, you and I worked really closely together for a couple years, got in shape. And I think over a decade later, we became really good friends.

Clance: Yeah, man. It’s interesting. When we first met, you thought I didn’t like you. You weren’t used to my style of training.

Brandon: A lot of people say that. It takes a little bit of time to get to know people.

Clance: Yeah. But it’s funny how, over the years, you’ve been in the best shape of your life, then you’ve been in the worst shape of your life, and I’ve seen both sides. And what I’m interested in, because we had a conversation, you’re back on the grind, and you look healthy and sharp and clean and good. And you mentioned 75 Hard. And you know, we had a talk and we’re going to get back on the grind in terms of training and structure, but you mentioned how 75 Hard made a difference. It was one of the most, I wouldn’t say fitness, but psychological fitness I would use in terms of just getting your stuff back in order. Let me explain that for me.

Brandon: Yeah. It’s not a fitness challenge. And I think that a lot of people misunderstand that there’s an insane amount of fitness because I think fitness is the foundation for any kind of growth. But it builds insane discipline. And I think, you know, you experienced this with me. You even made a joke once like, I don’t know why I haven’t kicked you out of this place. Real talk, man. Now, working for three months and then disappearing for a month, and that’s always been my problem with everything. I’m a very extreme person, very passionate, very driven, but you know, with this personality comes, it’s like a stock market – up and down. And finding that, everyone’s easy to find balance. I don’t think I can find balance, but I needed to learn how to control this energy that I have. I think that’s what I needed to find. And with 75 Hard, it built this discipline. So it breaks you down every day.

So, in the beginning, I started off every two weeks I would elevate something throughout this journey. So in the beginning I just got up and walked for 45 minutes, just to get started.

Clance: So you didn’t start it all right away, you just chipped away at it?

Brandon: Well, that was always my mistake, going full tilt on something. But what I was set out to do was do something long term consistently. That’s where I was, when I went into this, I was scared, I was like, there’s no way I’m going to do it. Fabian held me accountable to getting started, and that’s all I needed. And I realized that, I’m very goal oriented – once I get started on something, I’m like, tunnel vision. I don’t lose. And so I use that energy that I use towards my business, towards work, and put it finally into myself. And I just was determined after two weeks of committing to that everyday workout, drinking the water, following a diet, reading a book – a paper book. And really dialed in, and I was determined to get at it and make these changes. And man, it’s, there’s a reason they call it 75 Hard. I went to war with my mind every single day. So even when I was running, I hate running more than anything. And I’ve built this love hate relationship towards it, but I would be running and that little voice in your head would just like, you’re tired, you’re sore. That’s the start where your emotions come out. Should I just walk for the rest of this? Don’t go for a run today. Or that inner voice…

Clance: I call the inner b****.

Brandon: Yeah. But I was listening to it, and it’s true. It’s that thing that tells you to stop doing something or you don’t feel good. Don’t go to the gym. And so in his program, there is none of that. You don’t have that opportunity. So you get up. Well, I started every morning to run, no matter what, five thirty in the morning. And I just did it. And it was clockwork. For me, I had to be on a program, a routine, otherwise I get messed up. And so every day, I hated this for I think almost two months. I absolutely hated it. And then near the end of it is where things started really changing. And I started seeing these barriers go away. These voices going away. And then things became beautiful.

Clance: let’s explain 75 Hard because I want to go back to asking, so people understand what it is. It was created by this guy, Andy Frisella. I never heard about him, but I got introduced by Kayla, my stress therapist. She goes, you remind me of this guy, Andy Frisella. And I don’t know who he is. But anyway, she told me about 75 Hard. It’s drinking a gallon of water a day, two workouts a day (one indoors, one outdoors), taking a progress pic every day, workouts must be at least 45 minutes long…

Brandon: …Pick a diet, any diet, and stick to it. No alcohol, no weed, no drugs.

Clance: Yeah, that was the biggest thing for me when she said it. I like my little drinks here and there. I went at it, but I’ll tell you, I did 75 Hard twice. Failed the first time and then went back and crushed it. But, I messed up on something stupid like missing a photo. Reading is not a problem because I love reading. Anyway, I want to know what was the most difficult part of 75 Hard for you, and what was the most significant life change?

Brandon: The alcohol wasn’t the hard part for me, it was the weed. For the first two weeks, it was really hard to go to sleep. I smoke weed every night before bed. Not during the day, but when I get home and close my laptop, I like nothing more than to smoke, even a couple of puffs in a joint. It relaxes me, calms me down, and I pass out. So that was a huge habit I had to change from day one. I had insomnia for the first two weeks. You can’t take sleep aids, this isn’t a program where you’re allowed shortcuts. I had to go through a couple of weeks of not sleeping, working out twice a day – it was extreme. But I think my body needed that. Once I got past the second week, all the workouts and the lack of sleep pushed me to exhaustion, and something flipped. I started getting into a rhythm.

Another thing we should talk about is sleep, it’s really important. I started changing everything. I have a weighted blanket, a chili pad, I take magnesium, I don’t look at my phone late at night. I just started changing my habits to break the insomnia. So in the beginning, the weed was the hardest thing for me to let go of and adapt to.

Clance: Let’s touch on sleep a bit. I have no problem falling asleep. I can sleep anywhere, anytime. But a lot of people struggle with sleep.

Brandon: What were the changes you made to help with sleep, since you took away the weed?

Brandon: It took about a month. The biggest thing is the weighted blanket. It helps with pressure on your body, like someone hugging you. Also, you’re actually supposed to sleep on a cool bed – bring your body temperature down to 68 degrees. I have a chili pad, it’s basically a water blanket that sits underneath my sheet. It’s like sleeping on a cold bed.

Another thing, I stopped watching Instagram reels late at night. I used to think it calmed my mind down, but it’s like firing steroids into your brain. I wouldn’t have deep REM sleep. Then I quit smoking weed, which meant crazy vivid dreams, nightmares – there was a whole thing that came with it. But putting all these things in motion, not eating late at night, dim lights a couple of hours before bed, take your magnesium, a nice tea with honey, get in my weighted blanket, on the chili pad…it sounds crazy, but I took all these things together, consistently, and now I can fall asleep much better.

Clance: How many hours do you sleep?

Brandon: Six to seven hours if I’m lucky. I go to bed around 10 or 11 and I’m up around 5.

Clance: Nice. Now you feel

Brandon: like a new person. Like when I read my Wu band and I get like 80 percent sleep. Like that’s just wild to me.

Clance: Amazing. So with 75 hard, what’s the most significant change in your life that 75 Hard contributed to, or because of 75 Hard? What would you say?

Brandon: Everything. It broke down so many mental barriers, and discipline, it’s not one thing. The program works, and I think you and I talked about it, touched on this before, it’s not one specific thing about the program or the work, it’s the whole combination. But for me, it’s the discipline. Like, I don’t negotiate with myself anymore. I just get up and do things. You know, if I don’t have something planned, I get up and run. If I have a boxing now, I go and do that. I’m not doing two workouts a day anymore. That was just, I’m not a 20 year old athlete.

Clance: If you’re 20, it’s still. And then the second workout could be a walk.

Brandon: I know, but I wasn’t doing,

Clance: I was doing running. Running, yeah, that’s still, that’s more intense. I didn’t, I just, I’m not. The reason I like the two workouts is because we’re made to move. Sitting around, driving around all day. Working out, like, it’s amazing just going for a walk. How much better you feel clearly and that’s a workout. I just went for a walk yesterday. I was doing some scouting for hunting, but it’s amazing. How much moving your body is amazing. Doing a workout every day is easy now. I love it. If I don’t work out or do something, whether it’s a sun ice bath or a full workout, I feel like shit. So discipline

Clance: amongst.

Brandon: Everything. Everything. I get it. You don’t negotiate it. I love my sleep now. I don’t negotiate. I don’t tolerate, like, whenever, when I go out, I’m sneaking out the door at 1115.

Clance: You look like a movie star, dawg. You don’t understand. I haven’t seen this dude, you know, like the, the, it’s night and day how you look. Yeah, I feel. Since the last time I saw you,

Brandon: honestly. I was beat up for a few years. You know, and I think why I started this was. We had COVID. My industry got hit. We all got, went through some tough times. Nobody’s better than any other person. And, you know, I tried to come out of that rut so many times. I tried to, you know, it was just, you know, getting pounded so hard for those three years. Then coming back and, you know, with, with, with bouncing back and what it did to my career and what it did to our industry and just surviving like day in and day out. Mix that in with your own personal problems and everything else. It wasn’t being healthy. It wasn’t eating properly. It was drinking too much and it was just for too long. All these things were catching up to me and I was worn out. I was beat up. I was finally at a point where I was like, I consider myself pretty strong. I’m very good at picking myself up.

Clance: You’ve seen that. Exactly. I want to double down on that. Cause like for you, like, okay, Jim, you know, you like to party, you like to have a good time, whatever, but you’re a monster when it comes to business. You don’t mess around from what I understand. Yeah. You’re disciplined. You get at it. So how could you get any better in that? Like how could 75 hard or whatever you made that make that better? I want to understand that.

Brandon: I mean, well, my business partner always says like I’m operating at 50 percent of my talent when I’m not, Like this. Okay. You know, like I’m, I’m not, I’m a 90 plus right now, like, other than, you know, a day week. So the average, so 50 percent for the average person, that’s, that’s their 90%. I have, I take a lot of pride in like what I can do in a day’s work or in a week’s work and you do that consistently every day, showing up every day, seven days a week, firing on all cylinders. I mean, the world’s yours. Like it’s, I’m excited. I’m excited. It’s I’m excited to see what this next year brings. We have a lot of things, my partner and I in the pipeline with, with our business and what we’re going to do. And I need to be at this operating at this level. And you know, just about LPS, man, this is my home. Like, this is like, I, why I’m, I’m enjoying sitting here with you and why, you know, I was so proud to come tell you that I did it, you know, and I didn’t want to, you know, it was enough of the promises, it was like I needed to come here when I, when I was done, like the check mark, you know, and, when I knew that I was across the finish line, it was, this is the place I always came back to is my home, like, this is whenever I was not doing well, I came here. You know, I started here. I come look at you. You’d welcome me back in the gym. Like, you know, the son you never wanted to have. And, we would get at it. We’d do workouts together. You’d talk to me. You know, I came to you for some, in some tough mental places. Now it’s exciting to come back here in a good place. You know, not just coming here when I need to be brought back up. Now it’s, now, now it’s beast mode time. You know, they got, we have new goals. We got to talk for

Clance: This. And you know, I want to say, I’m a strict person. I don’t care who you are. I’m kind, but I want to give people a chance. There’s always something about you that never made me write you off or just say, this guy isn’t coming back to my gym. You know what I mean? You get rid of people, right? So, there’s always something because you’re real, you weren’t fake. I can see you trying. Like I can look into your eyes and see this guy needs this gym.

Brandon: I wanted it. It’s just like I didn’t know how to get there. And it’s funny, you know, I haven’t seen you for months and then I get a message from you. A lot of times those messages come when I’m at a low point.

Clance: It’s kind of weird, yeah. Like you’re at a low point, I haven’t seen you.

Brandon: I haven’t seen you in a while. You had this sense like something’s not right, and I’d be at the perfect time for that message. Yeah, that’s crazy how that works. Show up, let’s do it. Yeah, so I appreciate you.

Brandon: Just, the two major things that I got from this… honestly, being in this healthy position, all my relationships with family and friends are better. I’ve reconnected with some people that I lost touch with just not being in the right place. So everything’s starting to really come full circle, and I’m just happy, man. I’ve never sat here really comfortable with my skin, where I’m very confident right now and very happy. It’s not just surface-level, like you see on Instagram. I’m in a place of complete confidence. I’m okay being alone. I’m single right now. It’s the first time I’m able to go home and just be at peace with myself. So I’m in a good place.

Clance: You got this energy, baby. You got this confidence, you got this energy. It’s real. And, you said with 75 Hard, the biggest thing for me… I consider myself a disciplined person, but I took 75 Hard as a challenge. I messed up, did it twice, and I realized no matter what, you got to go out for that second walk. But that walk, wind, rain, snow… it made a huge connection with my kids and my family. That was one of the biggest takeaways for me. I got to spend more time, I would take them on the walk with me, my wife… I’m actually trying to get my wife to do 75 Hard right now. Yeah, and for me, I would say discipline. It just… I did 75 Hard twice. I failed the first time, but did it twice cause I loved it. And it helped me stop drinking alcohol. So that was the biggest thing… helped me stop drinking, period. And then it got me back into that mental fitness. It makes you feel like a monster, like you can do anything. You’re on a rhythm.

Brandon: Can you tell me what Live Hard is? I don’t even know what this is.

Clance: Live Hard is 30 days. It’s like Live Hard one, and then there’s Live Hard two… 30 days to complete the whole thing. You got to have like a, uh, powerless, um, cold showers. So everything you do in 75 Hard, just a couple of extra stuff. Same rules, but they added cold showers and you have to do a power list… three to five things that you have to do every day. Okay, yeah, I like a critical list that’s gonna drive your business forward. So whatever that may be… sales, talking to somebody… it’s more career-driven. But for me, it’s the cold showers that messed me up.

Brandon: Listen, I do ice baths every day and I’ll tell you, I would do an ice bath over a shower. I hate the cold shower. It’s like, what’s hitting you? I’d rather just get in, submerge, get it over with.

Clance: I’m Jamaican, man. I’m born in the tropics. That was the toughest thing I had to do.

Brandon: Wife just hears you screaming every morning, I guess.

Clance: No, I actually do them at the gym. So I kind of cheat – the shower at the gym is not as cold as at home. But after a while, you start getting in the groove. But damn, it took me a while. I would just watch the water… but I’m an impatient person, so I just started jumping in, soaping up in that cold.

Brandon: You do your full shower. May as well just get it done.

Clance: Exactly. That was tough for me. But the biggest thing was, you know, mental clarity, discipline…. but the connection I had with my family was much more. I’m more present. That was it. I noticed that.

Brandon: That’s the word I’m looking for. Yeah. The beautiful thing about this is like, you have to be with every emotion without doing anything to make yourself feel better. Like you can’t, even when you’re excited, when you’re sad…you’re not allowed to do anything to make that pain go away. You gotta live with it, and I think that’s the biggest thing I learned. My emotions always… I’m very emotional, so that would get the best of me. Let’s go and have some drinks and just wash that away.

Clance: One thing you mentioned, I want to get back to you. You were talking about how you would go to bed and thought scrolling through social media would kind of help calm you down before you go to bed, but it was actually the reverse. Yeah. Explain that a little bit.

Brandon: Well, what I learned was even about the bright lights before you go to sleep… You have to, you know the one rule, too, when you wake up, if you wake up early, you’re supposed to go and hit the sun or light right away. It sets your rhythm so your brain knows that your day has started and then needs to shut down at a certain point.

So if you think about that, and then think about when you’re trying to wind that clock down, you bring all the lights down, try not to watch too much TV, read a book… things that are not with constant stimulation. With Instagram reels, it’s bad. I’m ADHD, and this thing is like my s***. It’s like, give me drugs. So you’re just flipping… your mind is constantly triggering and firing up.

Now, whether that tires your brain out just to close your eyes, your mind is still racing. Imagine just like a wheel on bearings. The tire stops, yet it just keeps going.

Clance: It’s addictive. It gives you dopamine… there’s no secret that phones are insane. Now, I’ve been buried in work for the last month, but I literally just put my phone on the other table and then I sit down and do my work. I don’t respond to people as much as I did before. Not as accessible. Because when I realized I’m getting nothing done… I always walk around in circles. Just like, what the f*** am I doing right now? My mind’s thinking a hundred miles an hour… my phone is just adding to it.

I mean, phones are terrible. We all know that. I know you hate phones. I know you love them. You know what you want to get to?

I laughed when I came in here and you finally made the rule. No phones in the gym. You f***ing yelled at me, you yelled at everybody. I agree.

Clance: Listen man, I’m in the performance business. Right? And I’ve been paying attention, watching this for years. I’m a pretty disciplined person. I haven’t been on social media for, maybe three years, right?

One time I was sitting in the park with my kids, and they’re playing, and I’m on Instagram or Facebook. You’re not even there with them. That hit me so hard. I got off, went back sparingly… but before you know it I’m back scrolling.

So it hit me… Brandon, I’m a disciplined motherf***er. When I put my mind in something, I get that s*** done. It really hit me hard. I said, if this is giving me problems, imagine these kids who are not as developed as us. I’m looking and watching the gym and see these kids and adults on their phones when they’re supposed to be focusing on their training.

I started to experiment… put my phone away, turned off notifications, and started to just really have focus periods of time. A lot of people hate me because I don’t answer the phone while I’m f***ing working or studying. I try to have concentrated times to get back. People are calling back or check my messages. I’m not perfect and I still… This is not even social media, it’s just the bloody phone. Being a slave to a call, to an email… I started to pay attention to that.

When you said that in terms of once I started to control that, the amount of s*** I get done is crazy. It’s wild. Because your mental focus is on that task and you are exponentially faster. That’s one of the reasons why we decided to get the phones out of the gym… and everyone, they love it.

Brandon: Right. I mean, if you think of concentration and how long it takes to get back to what you’re doing when you are distracted… that’s why the best thing to do is block off time where everything is off except for whatever you’re working on.

Multitasking… I have a love-hate relationship with that word. It’s bullshit. I agree. You can have your attention to a lot of different things, but you’re not actually focused on anything.

Another thing I stopped doing is looking at my phone first thing in the morning… it would f*** up my concentration for half the day. Like, I couldn’t even stop. I don’t know what I’m doing… a thousand things of nothing. If every time you get off your phone and think about something other than the gym, by the time you get back to that workout, you’re not focused.

Clance: You can get distracted easily. Just like you said, even if it’s a quick distraction, it takes a while to get back into the flow. Bad calls, bad messages, personal stuff… your mind is there, not here. It’s a fight to get yourself back on track. That’s powerful stuff.

I’m part of this 4:30 AM group… Mensa, Wayne, Fabian, Allen. It was about getting up at 4:30 in the morning because that’s my power time. I love getting up then and getting things done. We have half a day before most people even wake up.

Brandon: Yeah, I’m a monster then too.

Clance: I don’t necessarily love getting up that early, but I know I get so much done because there are no distractions. I started this thing called ‘Savage 80’ – focus on one thing that’s the hardest, the most productive for you. No negotiating, you get up at 4:30 AM and do it for 80 days straight. Toughest thing is, I’ve been messing up… go hard for a few weeks, miss one day, and you gotta start all over.

I didn’t realize how hard that would be. But back to the distractions in the group… I’d check the messages before starting my tasks. Not a good idea.

Brandon: Checking at noon makes more sense.

Clance: Exactly. Now I check in later and it makes me way more productive. That’s another level of focus, and people underestimate how important concentration is. My goal is to master the art of eliminating distractions and focus. It’s going to make me better.

Brandon: I’m with you. I’ve actually got new goals, and a big one is really dialing in this focus thing. Learning how to channel different wavelengths of your brain capacity… there are times you need to be in different mental states. I’ll share more later, but you nailed it with the distractions.

The biggest change for me has been my morning routine, sticking to that changes your day.

Clance: Meditation was tough in Live Hard. I didn’t realize how hard it is to just sit and meditate for a few minutes to build focus. It’s crazy how you need to go down to speed up.

Brandon: I get anxiety when I sit down to meditate too… I want to get up and take action. But I understand those early-morning routines are key.

You know, watching you in the gym… there are days you need to stop people even when they want to push harder. That takes control. It’s about how you start your day. It’s how you adapt these lessons to all parts of your life.

Clance: That’s something I want to learn more about… I’m big on vision, but it’s not exactly the same as meditating. I’m big on manifesting. I manifested this whole gym. Now I’m manifesting bigger things, but I don’t understand the connection to meditation.

Brandon: It’s there. Part of manifestation is using meditation to calm your mind and focus on the thing you want in your life. I visualize it, read my written goals – you need your subconscious mind to believe it’s possible. I do this twice a day, every day. Morning to start the day, then before bed.

Clance: I’m going to try that. I write all the time. But the fears are there… does my subconscious mind believe this is going to happen? I’m going to implement what you’re saying.

So, we believe in ‘dominate’, right? I want to understand… when I say dominate, what does that mean to you?

Brandon: Being in control of your mind.

Clance: That’s it. That was easy.

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